Friday, June 23, 2006

Mr Muscle Grand Cru 2006



Today I am more pissed of than ever, as stupidity has taken a new foothold.

Our hard earned money, £87,000,000 to be exact, is going to be paid to European winemakers. Well what is wrong with that you might say, EU pays the winemakers and then we all get cheaper wine, or even get a bottle free sent to you via the post…Get real…They are paying this money, which is part of a total £335,000,000 spent annually on winemakers to do what???

Turn unsold, not undrinkable but UNSOLD wine into FUEL AND INDUSTRIAL DISINFECTANT!!! Yes you read it correctly FUEL AND INDUSTRIAL DISINFECTANT!!!
It appears that our European friends France, Italy and Spain produce 50% of all the wine in the world. The problem is that most of us like wine from the New World as they are easier to understand, the labelling is not so confusing and before you start telling me that I am too stupid to understand do you know what all of this means;

Domaine
Chateau
Appellation Controle
Grand Cru
Crianza

…though so, smarty pants…You see selling wine is not just about the price, it is about look and feel, otherwise how do you think customers choose their wine in the supermarket, or where ever they buy it. A bottle of Kumala Shiraz, label on the back says "good with meat or as a drink on its own"…Clear, easy and taste bloody good. The New Worlds export have risen 19 fold when the EU has only risen 5 fold in the same time.

Now there are some arguments that the way of making wine in the New World is not fair. Short-cuts such as flavouring using woodchips, rather than wooden barrels, is currently banned in the EU, but then on the other hand EU winemakers use sugar to increase the alcohol in crap wines. So if you don’t like it bloody change it!!! No one is going to die if EU winemakers start to flavour their wines with wood chips rather than wooden barrels…are they!!! Apart from some French Frog Winemaker who refuses to change anything...he doesn’t need to…he makes as much wine as he wants, stores it in his own cellar and sells the rest to the EU via a grant.

Does this mean that I am in favour of having 908,000,000 bottles perfectly good wine turned into Mr Muscle Kitchen Cleaner or fuel!!! Not in a million years.

What I want is who ever decided to pay these clown wine makers, who produce more than they can sell, any idiot knows that, from the day we had a lemonade stand selling on our street back home to anyone who made too much pasta at dinner only having to throw it out after they have had macaroni three days running, to be held responsible. They should be forced to sit and drink all the 908M bottles in one afternoon, you hold them and pour it down their slimy, political, greedy, little, EU necks…If you overproduce, let me tell you what you can do, sell it cheaper, change labels, make it sexy and if that fails you should go bust and not rely on a bloody EU grant...What is that all about?

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