Sunday, July 16, 2006

Time to Kill the Weatherman...???


The weather report, not science but prediction, not clever, but someone who worked out that it is what we want from the news…pretty straight forward if you ask me…but ask the media people behind the weather report and it goes into Spin City…”well people want to know what the weather is going to be like so we need to advise them and in the news it is the highest watched item in the bulletin”…we all know that at the end of the news bulletin, some person, male or female comes shining onto our new Samsung 32”+, 1.500,000 pixels in 16 x 9 instead of 4 x 3 (widescreen to you and me), with more Avon Lady make-up that you could sell on your round in the neighbourhood. What are they called??? Well we got Flip Spiceland (weatherman on CNN) and Francis, who would name a boy Francis (Sky News) just to mention two of them.

Here is what gets my wick on fire…

The weather report starts by telling me that it is sponsored by a hay fever tablet or some cheap and nasty airline…great, I sufferer from hay fever and Mrs E is miffed that we have only had “another” trip to see my family in Sweden, not going to Goa, India as I promised…great start Mr AD-Man…before your piece of information starts I am ready to sneeze the batteries out of the remote and I am getting an earful from Mrs E, because she does not know that Fly Be, Me, Bmi Baby, Ryan Air, Piriton or Becanese does not fly to Goa and she does not care, she just wanna travel.

Then Mr or Ms Permatan, like if they just arrived from a trip to Kenya, which makes Mrs E even angrier, comes on television and tells me…WHAT???

The bloody weather I had today??? What is that all about…I was here you were not you were in bloody Kenya, you dipstick…

Who apart from some blind, incontinent, old person, bedridden in a old peoples home with blinds covering their grotty unpainted windows wants to know about the weather they could have enjoyed today…Answer that Mister Advertising Man!!! She or he is hardly going to be asking for Antihistamine and a trip to bloody Tenerife is she????

Then the prediction start…Sorry but these people, the bloody weather people, who are now celebrities…you work that one out…have studied and have laptops, with internet access, so they know what they are talking about, I have been told so…cause I have a laptop...

They tell me that tomorrow it is going to rain…a lot…not just some petty little drizzle, no…proper man rain, more than 1mm, meaning that we cannot go outside and do gardening…OK...so we plan to have a day of DVD’s, perhaps a cleanup in the study and some serious upgrade to our entertainment system, together with a bottle of nice, red, South African, with a juicy…really juicy…behave….steak!!!

All is set and what happens…

I miss my bloody F1 from Magny-Cours because the Telewest TV Drive is gefunked, I am mowing lawns, because there is more sunshine than number 1000 sunblock can handle, Mrs E is flying like an elf along the borders and my Stihl petrol Strimmer (I told you before no electrical gardening in this family) is starting to fight back from exhaustion and for WHAT???

Because some bloody Weatherman predicted rain and I betted on it…What is that all about???

Picture © Sam Baker 2006

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great Picture...

Monday, 17 July, 2006  
Anonymous INXS-Luvuh said...

Speaking of gardening, the Smiffi Bush is growing like a weed, out here SouthWest of Newfoundland.

Monday, 25 September, 2006  

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